Friday, August 14, 2009

Changing Ways

On the car drive up to Lake Simcoe the winds chase the clouds until my daughter exclaims in wonder at their rapid speed,"Oh Mummy, I've never seen the clouds could move so fast!"
Out the window,the sun,a ball of fiery gold flashes through the branches of the forest, gleaming brilliantly through the leaves of the trees, racing by our side to be first.

This morning, all is calm and beautiful on the lake. In the evening, I watch the sunset and before my very eyes,the sky turns from pink to deep red and the clouds transform from an old traveler with a broken staff to a phoenix broad and strong of wing.

By night time, the lake is a turbulent,brooding mass of water the wind whipping and blowing wildly at its surface.

And so it is with us all. We change.
Today's unruly child is the calm and collected youth of tomorrow.
The raging little boy has evolved into a tolerant and empathetic young man, capable of dealing with disappointment.
The mother now sees that her worries and concerns were pointless;it was just a passing stage, nothing to fret about at all.

Nothing is permanent. We forget that in our worry to do what we think is right for the people we are responsible for. All too soon, they have grown up, passed away, left us behind.
Wouldn't we be better off if we loosened up, went instead into the mystery of things, had faith that this too will pass?


Anonymous said...

I agree, we need to relax and not let parental panic override the moment. My problems seem to arise when I am in a hurry and the kids don't cooperate, or if i listen to the voice in my head that carries value judgments based on what I imagine other people ("normal" people, perhaps?) might think: "Why is he letting his kid call the shots"
I guess I feel bad that I have failed to live up to my own image of parent/child, while succumbing to fear of appraisal. The problem is mine, not my childrens'

rfs said...

That is so true. The problem is ours. We get all worked up because we worry about what others may think about us;'"Her kids are so lazy,they don't help," or "they're so rude!" Expectations,especially our own are often other people's expectations.
Stop and pause-what would I be like if I didn't have this thought?
Naomi Aldort is helpful in working through this(she bases her ideas on the work of Byron Katie).

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