Saturday, April 17, 2010
Wanted: A Godmother
My 11 year old wants a Godmother.
"So Mum," she says the other day, "what are you doing about getting me a Godmother? I really want one."
And here I am, still thinking that godmothers just magically appear like they do in fairy tales, when you least expect them to. But I'm guessing like anything worthwhile you have to work at getting it (in my world at least).
"Why a godmother?"
"So that she can pay attention to me,and me alone."
"What do you want in a godmother?"
"I want her to be smart,and pretty and stylish, and she'll take me fun places and we'll talk and do stuff."
Aw. Who wouldn't want that? Get in line kiddo.
"And she mustn't have kids of her own. Absolutely not."
Ah ha. This is one bright kid. She's figured out that people with kids have limited attention and limited resources.
Here is a kid who has been volunteering in an old folks home so that she could hang out with seniors; "because they have something to teach me and I like them."
I get the feeling this kid is seeking to be mentored; she is looking for her own 'tribe' so to speak. She is trying to create that village that's so desperately needed to raise each child.
And she is getting good at it. For example, she wants a dog. She has wanted a dog for years now and has done all the research.
She has found a supporter in a family friend (who happens to have 4 kids of her own!!) and who is helping her with useful information, given her resources and offered to help with doggy upkeep (tooth brushing etc) as well as go dog walking together with her own dog.
Am I worried about this daughter?
No. I know she knows how to get to what she's after which is more than I can say for most adults who often, don't even know what they want. She'll get that godmother yet!