Monday, April 18, 2011

Blame it on Unschooling

Blame. Who isn't good at it? Personally, I'm quite an expert myself. "Who didn't put the milk away?" "The baby is crying because you talked too loudly." "It's your fault you missed the bus."
I'll catch myself doing it and think-this is useless.  Blaming doesn't change the situation.

As an unschooler, I've heard it been said that at should a child who goes to school turn out 'a loser' at least you can blame it on the school system. Who will you blame if you unschool?

Actually, you can be sure that when it comes to unschooling there's plenty of blame to go around when something is 'going wrong.'
Your six year old won't eat her peas- it's because you unschool.
Your eight year old talks too loudly? Are you sure it isn't because-you know..he doesn't go to school?
Ten year old wears mix matching socks.Unschooled!
Twelve year doesn't like hanging out but prefers her books? Gotta be she's unschooled.
Fourteen year swears much. Unschooled!
Eighteen year old has anorexia. Unschooling did it to her.

Sometimes the blame comes from the unschooled kid herself: "My geography sucks because you unschooled me." " I don't write well because I wasn't made to do it."
You know what my take on this is? One of the best things about directing your own learning is that you are encouraged to share responsibility for your learning and the older you get the more responsible you become for it. Ideally, you are assisted in becoming responsible for the way you act in the world.
It's a tough lesson as those of us who weren't brought up this way can attest. Now as adults we have to struggle with overcoming the urge to blame our shortcomings on others.

Unschooling is that you gain in some areas and loose in others and that is how you evolve yourself into an interested, interesting, vibrant person.
By the time you are old enough to be aware that there are areas of knowledge that you don't have but want to have, then you are old enough to seek said areas out for yourself-with the continued support and help from parents and mentors and teachers should you need them.

5 comments:

Jessica said...

For real! Traditionally schooled kids have tons of quirky problems in their lives and no one blames it on their schooling. Sigh.

Vickie said...

It's so easy for others to blame the thing that they don't understand. I think people also blame problems on unschooling because it helps them rationalize why they were made to go to school or why they send their kids. It's like "See! You guys have problems too!"

rfs said...

@Jessica- I know! And of course school will take all the credit if you turn out great.

rfs said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
rfs said...

@Vickie-of course we have problems-right? I mean being human means you have problems!!

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